First page of the The Ravings of The Beasts archive.

Staple Diet

Posted by Robert Godden on March 17, 2017 with 2 Comments

I was in the office the other day of an organisation that works in the organic food sector.

In their kitchen is a huge bowl in which the staff can throw organic waste for composting.

I noticed a teab*g in the bowl.

Now, a reasonable reaction is turn over the bowl and a few chairs and scream loudly : “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE???”.

However, my enquiring mind got in first and thought “what about the staple?”.

There it was, bold as brass (although not actually brass), a staple holding the unnecessary piece of dirty string to the filthy paper-pillow of undrinkable (though organic-certified) tea.

I wondered if it was acceptable for metal to be part of organic composting.

Turns out that metal is invisible in the organic process. It’s not seen as organic, or not organic. It just is. It’s like steel is suddenly Buddha.

Does that seem right?

I can’t see any ethical justification for teab*gs: if you care about the planet, why would you use one. But the staple, I think, takes it to whole new level.

Why are we providing worms with steel, the result of thousands of years of human cleverness? On the day when armoured worms rise up, pointing their fannings-soaked steel-tipped mini-lances at our ankles and attempting to subvert our rightful place at the top of the food chain, we’ll all be sorry.

Post Challenge Review

Posted by Robert Godden on March 21, 2015 (Comments Closed)

Well, we did it. A challenge was issued and four blogs were posted.

The four greatest male tea bloggers in the world* all took part in the challenge to create a non-fiction post using a title that some random person on the internet assigned to them, and the titles could only be drawn from the titles of Mills and Boon romance novels.

Here’s how it went down.

And thus ends another challenge.


*The four greatest male tea bloggers in the world, according to our sample survey of four male tea bloggers

Sugar Island

Posted by Robert Godden on March 15, 2015 with 3 Comments

THIS IS PART OF THE BoB CHALLENGE, WHERE BEASTS ARE ASSIGNED ‘MILLS AND BOON’ BOOK TITLES AND FORCED AGAINST THEIR WILL TO WRITE A NON-FICTION POST WITH THAT TITLE.   Sugar Island? As soon as I got given that title, I thought. “Yep, I know what I’ll write about: The Sugar Islands. After all, there’s no […]

Release the Beasts

Posted by Robert Godden on March 9, 2015 with 8 Comments

I created Beasts of Brewdom five years ago. The idea was that it was to be a place for out-there tea blogging, specifically by male tea bloggers. Yes,  it’s a Gentleman’s  Club. Not in the sense of hugely expensive meals and saucy goings-on, but as a counter to the overt feminisation of tea and tea-drinkers. […]

The Joy of Big Balls

Posted by Robert Godden on February 2, 2015 with 1 Comment

A cup needs an infuser, half full of leaf tea, To make a reasonable brew, satisfactorily. A teapot needs loose leaves all roaming free, And a strainer, to perform spectacularly.   But what of those times, when the two ideas meet? You enter a tea shop, fresh from the street, And respond to the person […]

Real Men Drink Flowers

Posted by on March 30, 2014 with 7 Commentsas , , ,

A post about chrysanthemum pu’er, in which Johnny encounters the supremely manly musk of this testosterone-laden tea. I am sick and tired of people decrying flowers as froo-froo, prettified, sissy-bait, or the like. When correctly viewed and ingested, flowery teas like this Chrysanthemum Pu’er brick can contain all of the necessary ingredients for the Exercise […]

The Perfect Pairing, You Young Whippersnappers

Posted by Robert Godden on February 19, 2014 with 12 Comments

I’m over tea pairing with food. Ho hum. All I hear some days is “Lord Devotea, what tea should I have with my Mars Bar foie gras?” Listen folks, we don’t have to be as dull as wine folk. Their product is just old grape juice. They need to oversell. “Please, please drink Chardonnay when […]

10 Of Your Opinions That Tea Lovers Don’t Give A Damn About

Posted by Robert Godden on January 23, 2014 with 15 Comments

Lord Devotea’s List Week. List 1* At some point, someone has probably offered you proper loose leaf tea. And perhaps you don’t drink it. That’s OK- and this list is for you! When offered, you may have made a hugely offensive comment. After all, you don’t drink tea, you’ve probably got other character flaws including […]

International Coffee Day

Posted by Robert Godden on September 30, 2013 with 4 Comments

It’s international Coffee Day. (It really is, look it up on Wikipedia if you doubt us.) It’s an important day. Over their lifetime, most people in Western countries will suffer from coffee at some time. It’s a debilitating condition, and as we swill the last of our Darjeeling FTGFOP1, it’s important that we put aside […]

Flattery of the Social Kind

Posted by Robert Godden on July 13, 2013 with 3 Comments

I had a bit of thinking about where this post needed to go. Not on my tea blog, as even a master of tea placement like myself can’t pretend it’s about tea. In fact, tea will only turn up once within this story. I’ll mark it with an asterisk so you don’t miss it. Not […]